"Something I noticed in our American culture is that children are isolated
from real life. They are encouraged to watch real life happen, to mimic it
in their play, to view it from afar, but not to participate in it. It is a
sad reality that those parents who take the initiative to offer their children
real life experiences are often chastised and critiqued by others."
--- Jennifer Johnson, mother of three, DR member
Being the party animals we are, Jennifer and I took recent advantage of a get-together
to discuss this topic. It stuck with me throughout the week---because of both
Jennifer's commitment to encouraging the integration of play and meaningful
work, and my own memories of frustration with the artificiality imposed on children.
Of course, I didn't phrase it that way when I was five. I hadn't
gone to college yet; I still used the English language in recognizable ways.
I thought: "I don't want to play with a pink plastic kitchen.
You can't cook anything. I want to cook smothered chicken for my mother."
The desire to learn life skills begins early, as does the desire to help. Toren,
Jennifer's youngest at four, is a bundle of energy. Sure, he's interested in
having fun, but he has no experience to tell him that work can't be fun too.
No memories of chucking frozen meat patties on a dirty grill for eight hours,
selling long-distance plans in a cubicle under headache-inducing florescent
lighting, or changing "which" to "that" twenty times in a manuscript.
Last time we all worked together to pile firewood for our community building,
Toren was one of the most dedicated workers. He informed everyone that moving
the small chunks to their own bin would be his special task. He chose it himself,
and had a very clear idea what he was doing.
He learned that trying to take on too much at one time wasn't the most
efficient way to handle the job, and picked up all the pieces he dropped with
absolutely no whining. He was part of a team, and equally in-control and valued
as any adult member. As Toren would say, "Isn't that [pause] amazing!?"
All through the winter, he will have the pride of knowing that he has helped
to keep us warm. He will also have the memory of work moving more quickly
when it is done cooperatively. Hopefully, he'll understand why the adults
around him are sometimes too pooped to play tag more than, oh, fifty or a
hundred times every evening.
Granted, it's harder in mainstream American culture to know what to
prepare your children for. There is such a variety of career options, not
many of them directly tied to providing for our personal needs. The more we
depend on others to provide us with food, clothing, shelter, and potable water
the farther we get from one of the obvious "meanings of life"--
the yearly cycle of tasks done to ensure survival of the body.
"Our children should enter adulthood with basic knowledge of how to
store food over winter without the cooperation of a nuclear power plant a
hundred miles away. Every animal in the forest is taught this skill; we owe
our children no less."
--- Jerry Minnich, root-cellar-savvy writer
Child's Play*
Levels of Closeness*
Ask a Rabbit*
Paths of Growth*
A Moving Story*
Nature Corner*
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